Apologizing to someone may be one of the hardest things to do. Some of us have a hard time admitting we’re wrong. How many relationships has this cost us? Even if it may not have caused the total loss of a relationship I’m certain it’s caused some animosity and lessened the relationship in one way or another.
A simple heart felt apology, the simple words “I’m sorry” have a tremendous impact on our lives. It can change a person’s mentality from one of war and strife to one of peace and love. Two little words, but they hold so much power!
Why is it we allow these two powerful and positive little words to interfere with our lives? Just uttering these words can have such a meaningful, tension releasing effect on not only the ones hearing them, but also on the person saying them. “I’m sorry,” how many times have you thought to yourself, “it wouldn’t be so bad if he/she had just said they were sorry?” Two little words!
How many of us are poisoned by the fact that we feel terrible about something we may have done or said in the past to someone and we wish we had apologized? We still can! No matter how long ago or how strained the relationship may be now we can still say “I’m sorry.” While the person may not accept and forgive you immediately, you’ll feel better that at least you tried, and who knows? In time this person may come to realize just what effort it took for you to apologize and see that you really do value their relationship.
I compare our remorse to a poison that is slowly, yet deliberately killing us each day. It eats away at us, causing resentment, self doubt, and sucking the very joy out of life. The longer it’s inside the more it festers and causes us pain. We need to find an antidote, a cure that will save us and give us our lives back. These two little words “I’m sorry” may be that cure, they may be just what is needed to repair our relationships; they may be our only salvation!
It doesn’t matter how long ago an incident took place. Just imagine how you would feel if someone you felt had wronged you 20 years ago, came up to you or called you, or even wrote you and said “I’m sorry.” How would that make you feel? There is no time limit for remorse! It can be a freeing feeling!
If this story helps you in any way then I’m thankful. If it inspires you to go out and apologize to a friend, neighbor, or especially a family member then I’m ecstatic! Relationships are hard to build but easy to tear down. Value every relationship, try to see the good in everyone, care enough to utter these two little words “I’m sorry.” It’s too important not to!
If this story offends anyone out there then all I can say is that was not my intention, and that “I’m sorry!”
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Friday, April 23, 2010
"How Important Is Acceptance?"
How many great men and women are hidden from society due to their own self imposed insecurities? We are all great in our own way, the sad fact that so many of us never reach our potential because of fear and worry of public opinion is an injustice to humanity. Not only do these crippling feelings cause pain to the individual, society also suffers.
People need to feel and be free to be whom and what they really are inside. How many of us are trapped into being and doing things just because we feel it’s what society demands, that it’s the only way to fit in and be accepted in today’s world? I’m sure that the cause of many mental illnesses are the fact that we feel imprisoned by our need to be accepted by society, we hide our true feelings and let them fester inside and poison our health and well-being.
Men need to be strong, virile, and confident. Women must be petite, soft spoken, and look their best at all times. These are just a few of the many unspoken perceived rules of society. What of the people who don’t fit these profiles of the proper man or woman? These are the people who are ridiculed and shunned by society. They are made to feel that they are doing something wrong or that they aren’t normal. The real question is what is normal? Who decides what normal is? Do we or should we really want to be like everyone else? Imagine how boring the world would be if everyone was the same.
Our differences are what make the world more exciting, more colorful. Imagine if all painting used the same colors, the same styles. Everyone sees the world differently; it’s just that most of us are afraid to say exactly how we feel. The fear of acceptance is a stifling emotion. The few of us who are strong enough to truly be ourselves are usually the ones who come up with many of the inventions, styles, and artistry (including culinary) that add spice to humanity.
Is it wrong to be a homosexual? Are homosexuals evil, wrongdoers? While I myself am not a homosexual I do respect their right to be who they are. There is nothing wrong, or evil about being a homosexual, just as there is nothing wrong with being a heterosexual. As long as there are two consenting adults it can’t be wrong. The only true wrong is not being who we really are.
People need to feel and be free to be whom and what they really are inside. How many of us are trapped into being and doing things just because we feel it’s what society demands, that it’s the only way to fit in and be accepted in today’s world? I’m sure that the cause of many mental illnesses are the fact that we feel imprisoned by our need to be accepted by society, we hide our true feelings and let them fester inside and poison our health and well-being.
Men need to be strong, virile, and confident. Women must be petite, soft spoken, and look their best at all times. These are just a few of the many unspoken perceived rules of society. What of the people who don’t fit these profiles of the proper man or woman? These are the people who are ridiculed and shunned by society. They are made to feel that they are doing something wrong or that they aren’t normal. The real question is what is normal? Who decides what normal is? Do we or should we really want to be like everyone else? Imagine how boring the world would be if everyone was the same.
Our differences are what make the world more exciting, more colorful. Imagine if all painting used the same colors, the same styles. Everyone sees the world differently; it’s just that most of us are afraid to say exactly how we feel. The fear of acceptance is a stifling emotion. The few of us who are strong enough to truly be ourselves are usually the ones who come up with many of the inventions, styles, and artistry (including culinary) that add spice to humanity.
Is it wrong to be a homosexual? Are homosexuals evil, wrongdoers? While I myself am not a homosexual I do respect their right to be who they are. There is nothing wrong, or evil about being a homosexual, just as there is nothing wrong with being a heterosexual. As long as there are two consenting adults it can’t be wrong. The only true wrong is not being who we really are.
"Dad"
My father was the kind of man that everyone looked up to and respected. Dad was incredibly smart and it seemed there was nothing he couldn’t fix or figure out. He grew up during the depression and as might be expected, that had a great influence in his life. During the depression money was scarce and hard work was the name of the game. Dad learned at an early age to work and to save his earnings, and to not trust the banks with all his money. He was very frugal with his hard earned income.
Dad was a workaholic; it seemed he always had to be working on something. As a child, we always celebrated our Christmas on Christmas Eve. Each Christmas Eve after dinner my family would journey to my parent’s bedroom where we would intently watch out the window for Rudolph’s shiny red nose, signifying that Santa was near. While watching for Santa we would sing Christmas carols as a multitude of pictures were taken. My father was hardly ever in these pictures though, before we ventured to my parent’s bedroom my father would disappear, my mother would tell us he had to work on something in the garage.
The fact that my father would be working even on this night might have seemed odd to most people, but not to us, we were all used to seeing him work so much. It wasn’t until years later that I realized he wasn’t out in the garage working, he was helping Santa. Our Santa had a lot of work to do too; with seven children eagerly awaiting his arrival.
When we would go out into the living room, after Santa had gone, we were amazed by the vast amount of presents that filled the room. Now, I believed in Santa a little longer than most of my friends, this was because when questioned about Santa my parents always explained there was no way they could afford to buy all those gifts for all of us. While I know my father worked a lot, I’m still amazed our parents were able to give us so much.
This is just one story, the stories and accomplishments of dad are too many to list, though throughout the years I know we will all be telling them to our children and grandchildren just to give them a small piece of what he’s given us for all these years.
To say my dad was a good provider would be an understatement. He gave us whatever we needed and more. Even though he knew the value of money and was very cautious with his spending, his sense of family was by far his strongest emotion, and he made sure his family was happy and well taken care of.
I realize this workaholic trait of my father’s supplied me and my family with many happy memories, but I just wish my father would have had more time to share in them with us. I always tell everyone that “I had the best parents in the world.” They taught us love, respect, and the true meaning of family. My only wish is that dad is happy; and that he knows how much he is loved by us all and that we’ll miss him very much. He is and always will be the greatest man I’ve ever known.
WE LOVE YOU DAD!
Dad was a workaholic; it seemed he always had to be working on something. As a child, we always celebrated our Christmas on Christmas Eve. Each Christmas Eve after dinner my family would journey to my parent’s bedroom where we would intently watch out the window for Rudolph’s shiny red nose, signifying that Santa was near. While watching for Santa we would sing Christmas carols as a multitude of pictures were taken. My father was hardly ever in these pictures though, before we ventured to my parent’s bedroom my father would disappear, my mother would tell us he had to work on something in the garage.
The fact that my father would be working even on this night might have seemed odd to most people, but not to us, we were all used to seeing him work so much. It wasn’t until years later that I realized he wasn’t out in the garage working, he was helping Santa. Our Santa had a lot of work to do too; with seven children eagerly awaiting his arrival.
When we would go out into the living room, after Santa had gone, we were amazed by the vast amount of presents that filled the room. Now, I believed in Santa a little longer than most of my friends, this was because when questioned about Santa my parents always explained there was no way they could afford to buy all those gifts for all of us. While I know my father worked a lot, I’m still amazed our parents were able to give us so much.
This is just one story, the stories and accomplishments of dad are too many to list, though throughout the years I know we will all be telling them to our children and grandchildren just to give them a small piece of what he’s given us for all these years.
To say my dad was a good provider would be an understatement. He gave us whatever we needed and more. Even though he knew the value of money and was very cautious with his spending, his sense of family was by far his strongest emotion, and he made sure his family was happy and well taken care of.
I realize this workaholic trait of my father’s supplied me and my family with many happy memories, but I just wish my father would have had more time to share in them with us. I always tell everyone that “I had the best parents in the world.” They taught us love, respect, and the true meaning of family. My only wish is that dad is happy; and that he knows how much he is loved by us all and that we’ll miss him very much. He is and always will be the greatest man I’ve ever known.
WE LOVE YOU DAD!
"Are We Spoiling Our Kids?"
Parents are always saying “I want to give my kids the things that I never had.” Why do we feel the need to give our children everything? Was our own childhood really that bad? I would guess that for most of us the answer is no. Of course we want to provide whatever we can for our children, but sometimes we do too much.
Are we doing so much for our children that they acquire bad habits that will actually hurt them and their future? Do the children expect the parents to wait on them when they are perfectly able to do things for themselves? Do the children perform choirs, even simple little ones, or do they just ignore them until the parent either yells at them or does it themselves? Do you have to wake your child in the morning or have to keep telling them where they have to go, or what they need to do, or are they responsible enough to set their alarm clocks, or know what they need to do without being told?
These are just a few things that will affect them in later years. The habit of waiting for others to do it, or not respecting others time by being late can eventually cost them their jobs as well as their relationships. Could our doing too much for our kids be the reason why there is so little respect in this country? Are we spoiling our children and ruining future adults?
Are we doing so much for our children that they acquire bad habits that will actually hurt them and their future? Do the children expect the parents to wait on them when they are perfectly able to do things for themselves? Do the children perform choirs, even simple little ones, or do they just ignore them until the parent either yells at them or does it themselves? Do you have to wake your child in the morning or have to keep telling them where they have to go, or what they need to do, or are they responsible enough to set their alarm clocks, or know what they need to do without being told?
These are just a few things that will affect them in later years. The habit of waiting for others to do it, or not respecting others time by being late can eventually cost them their jobs as well as their relationships. Could our doing too much for our kids be the reason why there is so little respect in this country? Are we spoiling our children and ruining future adults?
"Believe In Yourself"
The first step in reaching any goal is to have a clear and concise vision of exactly what you aspire to achieve. You lessen the chance to hit your target if don’t take the time to aim. Just imagine an archer shooting arrows all around in one general direction, how will he know if he hit his target if he doesn’t even know what he was shooting for? Obviously, you need to know the exact location you are trying to get to in order to find the directions to get there.
If you really believe in yourself you can achieve anything. The thing is you have to truly believe in yourself 100%. Physical limitations can be overcome if you have the drive and determination to do whatever you have to in order to reach your goal.
The mind can achieve amazing things, as history proves, your only limitations are the ones you put upon yourself. Just think of all the incredible achievements and accomplishments made throughout history that was thought impossible at one time or another, and of some of the people who were far less physically or mentally fortunate than us who achieved some of these miracles. As the saying goes, “anything the mind can conceive it can achieve.”
If you really believe in yourself you can achieve anything. The thing is you have to truly believe in yourself 100%. Physical limitations can be overcome if you have the drive and determination to do whatever you have to in order to reach your goal.
The mind can achieve amazing things, as history proves, your only limitations are the ones you put upon yourself. Just think of all the incredible achievements and accomplishments made throughout history that was thought impossible at one time or another, and of some of the people who were far less physically or mentally fortunate than us who achieved some of these miracles. As the saying goes, “anything the mind can conceive it can achieve.”
"False Happiness"
Why is it that we feel the need to tear each other down in order to build ourselves up? When conversing with a friend are you secretly hoping to hear about some misfortune they may have had or to at least hear of someone else’s bad luck? Even though you may care about or love this person and really wouldn’t want to wish anything bad on them, inside are you having a hard time feeling happy for any good fortune that may have come there way?
I believe most people feel this way, that the few exceptions to this are the ones who are truly and completely happy and satisfied with their lives. Does this make us bad people? No, it’s just a self-defense mechanism built inside us, telling us that if bad things happen to others, our lives may not seem quite as bad. While if others have good fortune, our lives feel just that much worse.
Is it true that the misfortune of others will cause us to be more fortunate? No! The truth is it really has no affect on our being more fortunate, it’s just an illusion our minds create to make us feel better about our own situations. I know we don’t really wish anything bad to happen to anyone, and that we actually feel bad about our minds telling us to hope for something negative to happen to anyone. This is a battle that rages on in our bodies, the good versus evil fight that everyone has inside of them.
Who’s winning the battle in your life? Is it the good or the evil? This ongoing war will be within us our entire lives and it’s in how we deal with it that we truly define ourselves. Sure the world would be a much nicer and happier place if we could all just be happy for one another and help each other any way we could, but we all know that’s just not going to happen anytime soon.
So, what can we do to change this world? All we can really do is to try our best to be the best friend, family member, and human being we can, and to help others to do the same. Let’s lift and assist each other when we’re down, and applaud one another’s accomplishments or good fortune. We can all strive to find joy in each others good luck and maybe take a small piece of each others happiness in the same way we do with the happy ending of a movie.
How do you feel after you just watched a movie with a happy ending? That feeling can be addictive, why not acquire that same type of pleasurable feeling in the real world when good things happen to real people? In your body’s battle of good versus evil get in the habit of questioning any bad intentions you may have or feel, and try to add to your friends’ joy by being excited for them. I’ll bet you’ll feel better about yourself knowing that you helped make your friends good fortune just that much better. That friend will appreciate you that much more.
I believe most people feel this way, that the few exceptions to this are the ones who are truly and completely happy and satisfied with their lives. Does this make us bad people? No, it’s just a self-defense mechanism built inside us, telling us that if bad things happen to others, our lives may not seem quite as bad. While if others have good fortune, our lives feel just that much worse.
Is it true that the misfortune of others will cause us to be more fortunate? No! The truth is it really has no affect on our being more fortunate, it’s just an illusion our minds create to make us feel better about our own situations. I know we don’t really wish anything bad to happen to anyone, and that we actually feel bad about our minds telling us to hope for something negative to happen to anyone. This is a battle that rages on in our bodies, the good versus evil fight that everyone has inside of them.
Who’s winning the battle in your life? Is it the good or the evil? This ongoing war will be within us our entire lives and it’s in how we deal with it that we truly define ourselves. Sure the world would be a much nicer and happier place if we could all just be happy for one another and help each other any way we could, but we all know that’s just not going to happen anytime soon.
So, what can we do to change this world? All we can really do is to try our best to be the best friend, family member, and human being we can, and to help others to do the same. Let’s lift and assist each other when we’re down, and applaud one another’s accomplishments or good fortune. We can all strive to find joy in each others good luck and maybe take a small piece of each others happiness in the same way we do with the happy ending of a movie.
How do you feel after you just watched a movie with a happy ending? That feeling can be addictive, why not acquire that same type of pleasurable feeling in the real world when good things happen to real people? In your body’s battle of good versus evil get in the habit of questioning any bad intentions you may have or feel, and try to add to your friends’ joy by being excited for them. I’ll bet you’ll feel better about yourself knowing that you helped make your friends good fortune just that much better. That friend will appreciate you that much more.
"Only A Memory Away"
This is something I wrote and read at my father’s burial. I’m adding this to my blog in the event that it may help others to deal with the death of a loved one.
“ONLY A MEMORY AWAY”
While this is a sad time for us all, we need to remember that Dad is and always will be with us each and every day. Sometimes we feel his presence, almost as if he were standing right beside us. Each day we’re reminded of things he’s said or done, bringing a smile to our face and a tear to our eye.
Dad is in each and every one of us in one way or another and we continue to pass on his wisdom and teachings to our friends, neighbors, and especially to our children. Dad’s abilities were limitless and his love endless. He would do anything for anyone, without wanting something in return. He lived his life the old fashioned way, caring for his fellow man, just as we all should.
He never bragged, or worried about getting credit for things he’d done. He had too much self-confidence to care what others thought of him. Dad always said “I’m going to do something, even if it’s wrong,” but with dad everything always seemed to turn out right.
We know what a great man Dad was and the love we all feel for him is a testament to the type of human being he was. From my mother, sisters and brothers, our spouses and children, to anyone who ever knew Dad, we can see the type of man he was by how much love and respect we all feel for him.
Dad lives on in us all; he’s in our smiles, our eyes, the blood running through our veins, and within our very souls. Dad will never be gone as long as he’s remembered, and his teachings are passed along to our future generations. His family and his land were his life, and his legacy goes on as we go on, loving and supporting each other just like Dad always did for us.
Love you Dad, I still see and hear you everywhere, everyday, and I know you’ll always be near. You’re only a memory away.
“ONLY A MEMORY AWAY”
While this is a sad time for us all, we need to remember that Dad is and always will be with us each and every day. Sometimes we feel his presence, almost as if he were standing right beside us. Each day we’re reminded of things he’s said or done, bringing a smile to our face and a tear to our eye.
Dad is in each and every one of us in one way or another and we continue to pass on his wisdom and teachings to our friends, neighbors, and especially to our children. Dad’s abilities were limitless and his love endless. He would do anything for anyone, without wanting something in return. He lived his life the old fashioned way, caring for his fellow man, just as we all should.
He never bragged, or worried about getting credit for things he’d done. He had too much self-confidence to care what others thought of him. Dad always said “I’m going to do something, even if it’s wrong,” but with dad everything always seemed to turn out right.
We know what a great man Dad was and the love we all feel for him is a testament to the type of human being he was. From my mother, sisters and brothers, our spouses and children, to anyone who ever knew Dad, we can see the type of man he was by how much love and respect we all feel for him.
Dad lives on in us all; he’s in our smiles, our eyes, the blood running through our veins, and within our very souls. Dad will never be gone as long as he’s remembered, and his teachings are passed along to our future generations. His family and his land were his life, and his legacy goes on as we go on, loving and supporting each other just like Dad always did for us.
Love you Dad, I still see and hear you everywhere, everyday, and I know you’ll always be near. You’re only a memory away.
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